I wanted to call this post “The LinkedIn Wall of Shame,” but that seemed harsh. The dumb stuff I have received lately definitely warrants a post as an illustration of what not to do on LinkedIn. 

I read recently somewhere that nobody joins LinkedIn to get pitch-slapped by a stranger. This is true – and yet is exactly what I have been experiencing. 

The names below have been changed to protect the guilty. 

Example 1: Clueless 

I had someone reach out to connect with me, which happens pretty much every day for me on LinkedIn. When someone asks to connect, I look at their profile to see if we know any people in common, are interested in some of the same topics, or if they could be a potential client. If they check any of those boxes, I accept the connection. 

Clueless barely made the cut, but I accepted. Right after I did, they sent me a message thanking me for accepting their invitation to connect. That is a good thing. 

Then, they told me where they lived and asked me where I lived. That info is at the top of our LinkedIn profiles, but I responded.

They then asked me how the weather was here. Huh? I resisted saying, “Let me Google that for you.” I responded that it’s been lovely or something like that. 

Then, they asked me what I did for my work. 

Are you kidding me? 

I referred them to the About section of my LinkedIn profile and wrote them off as clueless. 

I haven’t heard from them since. 

Example 2: Premature

I had another person reach out to me to connect. They looked like they had created some interesting software and might be a potential client at some point, so I accepted the invitation to connect. 

The next message was a thank you and an offer to be a beta tester of their newly created interesting software, complete with everything it would do for me and my business.

This might work with some people, but I have enough on my plate right now, so I politely thanked them and passed. 

Example 3: Bully

There are a few things that are potential red flags for me on LinkedIn. One of those is someone who has their name in all caps. Generally, that translates to a big ego or erratic behavior. I am going to copy and paste this exactly as it happened, typos included. 

BULLY: Hi! Catherine,

I’m professional Digital Marketer. I have more than 5 years work experience with Digital Marketing agencies. I’m Expert in Facebook marketing, Instagram marketing, YouTube marketing, Website promotion, Book Promotion, SEO expert, Google ads, Google Top Ranking.

Have a nice day

Thanks

Me: Hi <name>, thank you for reaching out. I am not willing to invest in help with YouTube and my digital marketing at this point. 

~ Catherine

BULLY: I have already visited your YouTube channel. Your YouTube channel is great.

I want to work for your YouTube channel. I will promote your YouTube channel to millions of targeted people through Google Ads and from there you can get an audience of 1k subscribers, 1 million views and 4k hours of watch time or more on your channel. As a result monetization will start on your YouTube channel.

And I will do high rank SEO for your YouTube videos which will grow your YouTube channel very fast.

Message me if you are interested, I will help grow your YouTube channel very fast.

Thanks

Your YouTube expert

(And another message following that)

I will give you 1000 subscribers and 4000 hours of watch time and 1-10 million views on your YouTube channel organically. This will start your YouTube channel monetization. After monetization I will setup ads on your YouTube channel. Then you can earn up to $5000-$7000 per month from your YouTube channel. I will complete your YouTube channel work within 10 days and deliver the work

Are you interested?

I am waiting for your response

Me: Thank you. I am not interested.

BULLY: Okay no problem

Be sure to message me when you start working on your YouTube channel in the future. i will waiting for message.

There is no way I would ever work with this person. 

I can’t imagine this tactic works with anyone.

Please don’t do this on LinkedIn, folks. 

Photo by Donald Giannatti on Unsplash